UPDATE: I realized after posting this piece (a blog from Aditya on Gorigirl.com), that the use of copy and paste from a blog site doesn’t really copy all the content. Because I feel that Aditya’s post is so important, I didn’t want to have anything lost in the translation. So, I’m going to give a brief synopsis here of his post and then send you on your way to the best site I’ve found so far. Gorigirl.com.
Arranged Marriages and Intercultural Relationships was written by Gori’s husband Aditya and gives good excellent advice from the guy’s perspective when it comes to culture, what is expected, what is accepted and what everyone should know about their own decisions in life.
When I originally read the post, I was inspired and in awe that he was so truthful about a scenario I see over and over again across the net.
In his post, Aditya hits upon one subject in particular that many people in an Intercultural Relation face and he lets you know, in no uncertain terms, that using the excuse of parental obligations as a driving factor in why they have to do an arranged marriage is just that…an excuse.
Quote from Aditya’s post (section under A Few Tips)
“2. I am sorry, but nobody can force you to marry anyone. Unless your parents are holding an Uzi to your head, you don’t need to marry anyone. Emotional blackmail is rubbish – If your mother threatens to commit suicide, let her say that – she’s bluffing. Think forward 10-15 years… when your five-year-old throws a tantrum about the latest shiny toy, buying him the toy is the last thing you want to do – you’re rewarding bad behavior. Standing up to your parents when they behave poorly is just practice for that future five-year-old. :)”
I strongly recommend reading the rest of the post for yourself. And while your at it, browse around the rest of Gori’s site. I found it instructive, insightful, funny and inspiring. It’s helped me in more ways than I can count and I hope that you also find it to be the same for you.
Plus, Gori’s a pretty amazing person herself.